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I Am Not a Huge Fan of Living In Mexico Right Now
Would this happen in the States? Well, I guess it's possible...but would it?
I had an OB appointment and another ultrasound. (Everything is fine with the baby so don't worry and this wasn't with my usual OB, I had to go to a different office for the ultrasound) Before I even got onto the bed I told the doctor who was doing the ultrasound that I didn't want to know what we were having, that Kris and I were looking forward to a delivery room surprise. She said she wouldn't tell me and would let me know when to turn my head when she got to that area.
She was having a problem getting an image of the baby's face so after about 15 minutes of trying she called in another doctor. The first doctor told the second doctor that I didn't want to know the sex of the baby. The second doctor made a snorting sound and told me "You Americans". Of course I was 'slightly miffed' at her response but blew it off. She said "well lets see what you are going to have here". I told her we had 3 boys and both of us wanted this to be a surprise and that I was serious that I didn't want to know. Throughout the ultrasound she was a complete snot (which means Bi%$#) about my decision and continually tried to convince me that I was wrong not to want to know. The jist of what she said was that it wasn't right that we didn't want to know...everyone wants to know what they are having, and that I would never be able to make it till the end of my pregnancy without knowing (I'm 29 weeks, I think I've done pretty well already).
I looked at the other doctor and told her that she could finish the ultrasound since a clear image of the baby's face had already been recorded. As the ________ (every possible horrid, crass, disgusting, gutter word your or I could ever come up with to call this woman fits into this blank) got up from the ultrasound machine she pointed to the screen and said "well, you have a very healthy baby ________"
That was it, no apologies from either doctor and to be honest, I was in such a stupor of disbelief at what had just happened I couldn't even say anything. What was weird (and this will tell you my state of mind) I was so numb, not a single violent thought crossed my mind at that moment (I know!!!!). I got up off the bed, pulled my shirt down over the ultrasound jelly goo all over my stomach and walked out. I don't feel like I even got to really enjoy the news, like that moment had been stolen from me.
I still have no words as to how I felt. What do I even compare this to? Happy news on one side but at the same time it's like...I don't even know. I happen to like surprises and I was really looking forward to the fact that we would not know until the baby was there in front of us. It was a big deal for both of us even though it wouldn't be a big deal to anyone else and yes, just something pretty silly for the outsider looking in, I'll admit it.
I came home, I think I may have said "Hi, thanks for watching the kids, Kris" and just crashed on the bed and slept for 4 hours I was so depressed (not at the actual news of course, just the manner of delivery). I think Kris must have thought I wasn't feeling well because he didn't bother me. When I finally woke up I went into the office where Kris was on the computer and told him what happened. He was upset but brushed it off as par for the course here in Mexico City, he's just used to it since he runs into these self centered types on a daily basis. Just one more piece of trash in this City...
He hugged me, I was crying because I was upset that I had been told something I didn't want to hear yet...he was crying because not only does he get to look forward to Father and Son Campouts...but Daddy Daughter Dates too.
Always In The Middle
13 years ago
28 comments:
Oh sorry that was such a lousy visit. That is so inconsiderate and rude. But YEAH! A girl. Oh, she's gonna be so pretty! All your boys are adorable. How can she be anything but the loveliest. I think she will have black hair. He he! I am so excited for you! I hope the upset will soon be replaced by just the happy thoughts of your new daughter. We love you! Can I ask what you are thinking of for names?
Holy Crap! Maybe I mis read my re-read, but is their more than one? Or are the father son camp outs just a given with your boys. Please set me straight ASAP!
I am so sorry about the Dr. but get going on names...
I said it was a girl I said it was a girl. Stupid Mexicans. I vow to never go to Mexico!
Felicidades!(just kidding) Congratulations! I am so sorry about the doctors. One of my friends from Mexico told me she couldn't understand why I cut off my hair for a not so pretty short hair cut. Rude! But they really don't think they are being rude, which in turn makes it more frustrating. Anyway, I am on the prowl for emerald green baby girl stuff! I thought you were going to leave us hanging there for a minute, thanks for sharing. I guess if that happened in the states you could sue?
Too funny, Line sisters. One of the first things I told Kris was that I hoped she had curly dark brown hair like some of her aunts or black curly hair like his.
As for names we have several picked out but have been trying to narrow it down (since we found out we were pregnant). It was easy for the boy's name and we had one picked out for a boy (Dalton Patrick) but since we won't be using it now. I had a girl's name picked out since High school...Malia Elizabeth, but thanks to Obama, I'm not about to jump on the mad dash popularity the name Malia is now going to have. Then there was Reagan but that's pretty darn popular too. So we are back to square one. Kris and I are big on unique names where the chances of another kid having that name in the same class are pretty slim. We have a few more months.
Sorry about your stupid doctor. But yay for a girl! If you need help with unique names let me know. We keep a running list of names so when we have kids it'll be easy to choose. Congrats! And thanks for all your comments on my blog. I love hearing your point of view on things!
I am so Happy you are having a girl. And I so would have smacked that Doc. I can't believe that. So sorry. Give Kris a big hug and you to and tell him I am so sending PINK things jk, I am really excited. Congrats.
so... do you know this made me tear up????!!!???? like i am seriously tearing up right now. totally emotional. i was so angry and so distraught through your whole post and then TOTALLY OVERJOYED AT THE END!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
we might need to throw a party...
WHAT A B*%$#@!!!!!!! OH! I am so mad!!!!!
But I am excited to send you cutsie girlie things!!!! (with little pink guns on them...)
OH!! Btw... that was FOX's comment!! Dang, I am not signed in as me!!!
Congratulations!! I had to come here to see your news. I'm sorry to hear about the way it went down, but very excited for your healthy little girl!
I think it is great to sample both sexes. As a parent to each (5 boys, 4 girls) I really couldn't pick one over the other. Each is such a unique and wonderful experience. I think you're going to love it!
YAY!! But, bummer about the dumb woman. I am so excited for you guys!! Sorry about the delivery. But, now you get to go shop for all that pink that is lacking in both of our houses!
jeez- what a pi&$-ant of a woman. of course, just to play devil's advocate, I'd not be buying too much pink if I were you- maybe she was just saying that to throw you the other way so you'd start planning for a girl and really it's a boy? who knows- but regardless, you're going to have a gorgeous (no doubt) healthy baby in 10 weeks :) that's worth celebrating!
Garity! Oh that made me cry, I don't cry! Oh such wonderful news for the Line family even if it came in a horrible way.
Just think of all the dresses! And bows! And Mary Jane shoes! And Pink! I am so happy for you. Get the f out of Mexico!
Love you, sweet lady!
Shawnna
What an obnoxious lady! I'm so sorry that happened to you. I would be completely stunned, too. However, congratulations on your new baby girl! Have fun shopping for all that pink :)
--Garaghty
Garity, that is so awesome, the part about the girl, but your story almost killed me. I am so sorry-but after the crappy things those delightful people did to us while vacationing in Mexico it does not surprise me one bit! Congrats to one of your favorite families!!
Yay girl...but...
Stupid ultrasound tech, or doc, or whatever...I would be SO pissed. Oh man...my own pregnancy hormones are boiling for you!
Do you ever feel so overwhelmed with pregnancy hormones that you WISH for something to get mad at?
Oh man, I probably would've bawled my eyes out because she stole the moment of finding out together.
Uggh! I'm so sorry.
Horray for a girl! Sorry the moment was stolen from you though. She must have some serious issues in her life to make her so thoughtless and mean. Let it go. She isn't worth it. The miracle of birth is so much bigger than some stupid idiot!
Have fun shopping! Pink camo is in style now.
Yeah!!!! How crazy...that's Mexico for you! At least it is a good story to share. =) Congrats!!!
UMMMMM.....NO PINK!!!!! She won't wear pink until she chooses to wear it herself! Those of you who know me best know my issues with pink....they are unwavering! Now mint green and lavender on the otherhand...one of my fave combinations! I'm afraid she may find herself in blue jean overall hand-me-downs but we'll be sure to put a bow in her hair ;)
Rachel- I missed what happened while you were here in Mexico! You must catch me up!
Ash- No, definately a girl. A 29 week ultrasound (my 4th ultrasound for this baby actually) has quite a bit of definition compared to one at 20 weeks. 3 super clear, ummm, lines where the Doctor was pointing (as opposed to a 'clover leaf'...what I'm used to seeing)
Abby- Strangely enough I've been pretty mellow this pregnancy (maybe that should have tipped me off.) I was evil while prego with the boys. Kris has been amazed that I haven't killed anyone with all the crap we've gone through here...should have been a clue that it was a girl?
Great! Thanks a lot! I didn't want to know what it was but you had to go put it in there, didn't you? And you were doing so well until the very last 4 words... So have your surprise spoiled and then pass the spoiling along to your readers? I can see clearly that your living in Mexico is making you Mexican! (I'm teasing you, in case it wasn't obvious).
Now, here's the real gotcha, how do you know she wasn't messing with you? How do you know that she, knowing you didn't want to know and acknowledging that you're a out spoken strong opinioned narotic foreigner, didn't tell you the exact opposite of what it really is? This is how my mind works. It is a free country, you came to my office for my services and expertise, if I want to throw out there what's on my mind, I have that right as much as you have the right not to hear what I have to say, gotta love freedom of speech... But seriously, why should you believe one way or the other (unless you saw for yourself, and then shame on you)? I would not be buying mint green, lavender or anything until this baby comes because my guess it that she was totally jacking with you! Of course she could have been jacking with you and saw things incorrectly too, so maybe she told you a lie but was wrong about her diagnosis and ended up telling you the truth after all. Doctors/nurses have been known to get these things wrong... So, did she tell you the truth? Did she tell you a lie? Was she right or wrong? In reality, you're right back to where you were, really not knowing one way or another :) Don't you feel worlds better now???
I personally agree with this lady though, I can not see any good reason why people want to wait. It's not like waiting is going to change what it is... If you've never had a girl, you're not going to know anything more than you did before. I know it's a preference thing but I still don't get it, whether that discovery happens today, tomrrow or at delivery. And especially for a person like you who is quite anal about planning and preparation (thinking back on your preparations for your move to Venezuela...) In addition, I'm also like her because I'd love to be picaro with pushy/bossy foreigners who act like they have hand but don't really don't have any hand in the matter (it's a control thing). I'd definitely tell you the opposite! Then when/if I ever saw you again after the baby, I'd say, "you didn't want to know so I played your game (my way) and didn't tell you (really) - I'm off the hook!" In fact, aren't you now even MORE surprised at delivery because I lead you astray? Mission accomplished!
I know I'm evil like that... But my point is that in the end, you won't really know the truth until the baby gets here anyway, and in reality, just knowing the gender tells you next to squat about this little heavenly person with a world of potential. So I say everyone should take back their "pink" congratulations and wait until the metaphoric fat lady sings before we start cheering (or crying), one way or the other. One final comment, it is my opinion that a just God would make sure that every woman had the opportunity to raise a daughter, just to give them first hand perspective on what a pain women are or can be (LOL). And I hope she loves pink and lot's of it, lol... I think Kris has his perspective covered trifold! But I'm hoping for a girl for you guys, but Iif it's a boy, I will reflect back at this blog post cracking up.
Hope my comment doesn't piss you off too much. At the same time, you should be happy to know that your posts incite and stir up this kind of emotion to draw people in. That's a compliment to an effective writer who captivates and engages her readers :)
Pucha, I decided to read the other comments before posting mine only to discover that this Ashly beat me to the punch on my theory.
Greg, nah, your comments never tick me off.
Unfortunately I did see the screen when she was pointing at it as she told me...3 lines, no clover leaf...very obvious at 29 weeks especially when I'm used to seeing that clover leaf. So I saw it myself and like I mentioned in my previous comment, the details are pretty clear at 29 weeks so it's a little more than 3 lines that you are seeing.
As for the planning, I usually fly by the seat of my pants...Venezuela was an odd situation where had we NOT planned it would have been a nightmare for the entire family. I'm not a planner and Kris will tell you I leave everything till the last minute when it comes to things that should have been planned for...especially packing for trips...drives him absolutely insane!!!!! I have my moments when I get things done in advance though...depends on my mood.
I'm not planning on buying anything for her (even if it was a boy) since we have tons of baby clothes, blankets, onezies etc...I'm practical like that, why spend more money when we have perfectly barely worn clothes? She can wear blue with a blue bow in her hair, I don't think it will give her a complex later on. We have a lot of neutral baby clothes (tons of green) so for the first 6 months she'll be just fine. I'm not into the whole baby shopping thing, that's my mother's area and she always seems to go overboard even though I threaten her and tell her we have plenty. She's a shopper, I can't stand shopping.
I guess Kris and I were just having fun looking forward to the delivery knowing that's when we'd find out. We found out with the 20 week ultrasound with the others, been there done that sort of thing, so now lets find out when the baby arrives and stretch the suspense out a bit! Something new to mix it up for our last baby...just for fun. Now we just need a name.
Seat of your pants huh? Practical? You're speaking my language! Names are tricky sometimes... I threatened to name Nathaniel "Seven" because he was #7 and because George Castanza always wanted to name a kid "Seven". Later that summer, we met two different kids named Seven (OK, one of them was Sven, but it was weird). Creeped me out. My brothers said they'd eject me from the family if I was serious about "Seven". I wasn't, but is it really all the much different than "Kevin" (one of my brother's names)? How about "August"? "Wednesday" (from the Adams family)? "Lois Line"??? LOL!
Well, have fun with that name thing!
Fair warning...I never wanted a girl.
I actually cried, and had a complete breakdown, after trying to pretend I was happy all day after finding out. (it was good we decided to find out early, gave me time to adjust)
I never wanted her to wear pink. I am just not that girly. But, then...there she was, all sweet and feminine, and all alone in the face of 2 (now almost 3) brothers.
She loves to dance and look in the mirror, and she's a complete space cadet.
I finally decided one day...she will no longer wear hand-me-downs. And she can wear a dress every day if she wants...and she does.
She's the princess.
I'll tell you this...I now look at all the baby girl stuff and I wish I hadn't tried SO hard to avoid the pretty, girly, pink stuff. Now, I wish I had another girl to put in ruffly dresses.
Embrace the girly...especially if you're only gonna get to do it once, like me.
SOOO excited for you! There is nothing like having a girl in the home... trust me, I know!! :) One thing is for sure, girls know how to melt daddy faster than anyone! Now as for the doctor.... what shall we plan? I am all for a coalition against retarded doctors. One often would come into my room, look at me and say, "Are you depressed?" That's it, no history, how are you, nothin. Just are you depressed. Finally I answered, "Should I be?" grrrr.... I hated egotistical doctors, but I love my lone girl. It will be special no matter what. CONGRATULATIONS!!
I'm just so thrilled that you got yourself a little girl! YEAH!!! It totally sucks that you found out this way, but hey, it's such good news! So happy for all of you!!!
I'm making "her" blanket - I'm so happy ....I had a dream you'd have a girl just before New Years...oh my! My name choices - acatual names I had chosen & gave:
1. Kelly Jalysa - Kelly Colleen
2. Holly Christine-Rob Patrick - Charles Robert Line, Jr.
3. Daniel Glenn
4. - - - -? Patrick -Kris Patrick!
5. Holly Christine
6. Heather Anne
7. Heidi Jean
8. Michael Allen - Kerry Ellen
* I wanted a girl so bad when I had # 4 ....I tried pink on my baby - what an absolutely beautiful perfect baby boy! Definitely not pink stuff - all blue! Also...I always wanted to name a girl Danielle. Another boys name: Michael Allen.
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